Do We Have to Sleep Train?
As a pediatric sleep consultant, I often hear parents ask, “Do we have to sleep train?” If you’ve been looking for answers online, you’ve probably come across a range of opinions. Some say you should sleep train as early as possible, while others believe that all children will eventually learn to sleep through the night without any intervention. So, where does the truth lie? Here’s my personal take on it... The short answer is: No, you don’t have to sleep train. The long answer is more nuanced: Sleep training can be a helpful tool if what you’re currently doing is no longer enjoyable or sustainable for your family.
The reality is that there’s no one-size-fits-all solution when it comes to baby sleep. Every family is unique, with different routines, preferences, and needs. As long as you’re following basic safe sleep practices, anything from co-sleeping to feeding to sleep and anything in between is fair game. As long as it’s working for you... I say: You do you!
Here’s where it gets a bit tricky: Based on my experience, what works today may not work tomorrow. For example, you might have rocked your baby to sleep for the first few months of their life. But now, your little one is taking longer and longer to fall asleep, and the extended rocking sessions are becoming physically challenging for you (Hi… I’m speaking from experience here haha). It’s okay and entirely normal to feel like you’ve outgrown certain sleep habits. It’s also okay to recognize when you’ve reached your limit with sleepless nights. Sleep is crucial for both mental and physical well-being, so it’s natural to want to find a solution that works for everyone involved.
That’s where sleep training can come in. Contrary to some popular beliefs, sleep training isn’t just about teaching your baby to self-soothe or using a specific technique to get them to sleep. When done thoughtfully, sleep training considers a variety of factors that influence sleep, such as nutrition, daily schedules, and bedtime routines. By optimizing these aspects, you can create an environment where sleep comes more easily to your little one. Once these pieces are in place, a settling technique that is age-appropriate and tailored to your child's temperament can help them learn to fall asleep independently, which is often the last puzzle piece to achieving better sleep.
If you’re thinking about whether sleep training might be right for your family, here are a few things to consider:
Are you ready to make a change? Implementing changes, especially around sleep, can be challenging. It often requires consistency and patience.
How much support do you need? There are many resources available, from self-help books to personalized, one-on-one guidance from a professional. Think about what level of support will best suit your needs and your family’s style.
Choose a certified, trusted professional. The pediatric sleep consulting industry is relatively unregulated, so it’s important to find someone who has received proper training and has experience in the field. This will ensure that you’re getting advice that is safe, evidence-based, and tailored to your family’s needs.
Find a consultant whose values align with yours. Sleep consultants have different methods and philosophies. Look for someone whose approach resonates with your family’s values and comfort level.
In the end, the decision to sleep train - or not - is deeply personal. What’s most important is finding a solution that feels right for your family and meets your needs. You’re not alone on this journey, and there’s support out there when you need it.
